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Old Jul 18, 2011, 04:48 PM // 16:48   #1
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Hey, first time writing a fanfic. It was somewhat fun. Criticism would be appreciated as I'm a total noob at this.

Chapter 1
You know the funny thing about fisherman’s haven is that there is sure a lot of fish. It’s a nice destination and all, but asides from the coconut, drake kabobs sousuke was frying up, there’s just fish and fish and more fish. So I was relieved when I received the imperial message.
I recognized it right away, it was adorned in silver and affixed with a prominent dragon seal. For a second, I entertained thoughts that they were inviting me to a party. Ha, like that would happen.
“Thanks Zhed,” I told my messenger as I laid back on my hammock sipping my coconut drink. I heard him mutter something about a lazy two legs and smiled. That smile however would soon fade as I read the contents of the message, it was a plea for help with the afflicted in Cantha by one of the ministries.
I recalled those abominations of Shiro’s and I shuddered. I was a necromancer and I had fought through my share of the hordes of undead in Kryta, but there’s something just unsettling about those afflicted.
I looked over at Gwen and Keiran eating each other’s faces. This was their honeymoon and we tagged along in the area, but their constant cute couple in love behavior was getting on my nerves. We’re heroes and we’ve been on vacation too long and I was sick of them sucking on each other’s faces.
I grinned. I called out to Gwen, “Hey, gwen, good news! An all expense paid trip to Cantha to fight our old buddies, the afflicted” Her eyes widened and she pushed Keiran away as her face drained of color.
Keiran shot me a death look, “what are you talking about?”
“Oh, gwen didn’t tell you about him?” I smiled. I’m a bit sadistic; I’m a necromancer, so sue me.
Gwen ran off to retch behind a palm tree, while I laughed and explained to a puzzled Keiran. “Gwen doesn’t like the afflicted, as you can see obviously, they’ve done a number on her laundry.”
Gwen looked up and wiped her mouth. “You’re such an ass Awry. After we finished our missions at Eye of the North, you told me you were going to take me to Cantha to experience the sights and people. I went to Cantha and all I got was guts and blood and this weird green stuff all over my clothes. Sure you might not notice any change in your hygiene, but I smelled like sewage for weeks!
“I resent that! I have an aged, layered and sophisticated scent,” I retorted, nose in the air.
Gwen shook her head and walked back to the cabin, “I’ll start packing in a few minutes. Let me be alone with my wedding dress for a bit to mourn. I won’t come across clean clothes for a while.”
Yup, time to bust out my old “funeral clothes”. Lots of death and mourning to come, I thought to myself.

Last edited by awry; Jul 19, 2011 at 06:23 PM // 18:23..
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Old Jul 18, 2011, 04:49 PM // 16:49   #2
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Chapter 2
I called my motley band of heroes(more like mercenaries those dirty gold grabbers) and we arrived in Cantha to meet the representative of the Ministry of Purity.
Assembled with me were my trio of elementalists, ordered midgets first, Vekk, Sousuke and Zhed. My monks, my girl Tahlkora, my man Ogden. The lone ranger, Jin. And the lovely Hayda who I took along as she was had quite some experience dealing with nasty creatures in the middle of nowhere.
We met our contact, Zei Rei in Kaineng City. Big and spectacular as always, although I can’t say much for the city planning and the map making. He was a man clad in Silver and hailed our crew.
"Are you by any chance...? No, it is you! This is well and truly an honor. I did not think I would get to meet one of the heroes responsible for Shiro Tagachi's defeat. Cantha owes you a debt of gratitude for what you have done."
"Since the fall of the Betrayer, Cantha has continued the fight to protect itself. The Ministry of Purity was formed to empower the people, that we might stand together as a stronger whole, to keep our homes and loved ones safe. Countless lives were lost to the Afflicted Plague, and that is a horror that we must never allow to happen again."
"The Ministry of Purity has fought tirelessly against the Afflicted, and the end seems to be in sight, at last. I wonder... If this would not be too forward of me to ask, would you lend Cantha your aid once more? Afflicted have been found in Bukdek Byway. I go there to face them, and I would be privileged to have you stand at my side."
“Zei Rei is it?” I affixed the dread mask to my face and looked at his blank features with my own equally inscrutable mask. I could see the glossy eyes and wicked grin of my mask reflected in his shiny armor. Equal now. “I will stand by your side as we venture to climb this mountain of dead foes."






Chapter 3
The flames caused the air to ripple, the conflagration of flesh released a burning smell that mixed with the stench of the dead as I bound flesh to form and walked them to my will. The elementalists did well, they scoured and seared the Afflicted in mass and we round them up to let them pursue us and then turn around to immolate them in narrow alleys. The sounds of abominations dying in unison is music to my ears!
I taught Jin the blood arts and I was using her to fuel the energy of everyone else in the party. She made a good apprentice, and besides Hayda wouldn’t work with Livia who she had deemed her, in her own words, a harlot. It is also funny seeing sousuke flush red everytime she bleeds over him deliberately slowly. She’s a total vamp now. I am so proud.
As for Hayda, she screamed through the cities stating the obvious that the afflicted were, indeed on fire. It helped our morale. I think.
Tahlky as always was a beast and did a phenomenal job alongside Ogden. They held up in extended fights with huge groups of afflicted at once without tiring. And props to Zei Rei, he was no slouch either.
Our first day, cleaning, I was tired and I was ready to call it a night. When we went back to the guest suite we were staying in, I motioned to Gwen to come over.
“Eww, no, you guys stink.”
“That’s the point. Hayda’s out tomorrow, you’re in. Get ready, we’re going to burst some more zits off the map”
She frowned. “That analogy stunk worse than your odor.”
“Everyone’s a critic”, I thought and slunk into bed dead tired.



... to be continued ....

Last edited by awry; Jul 18, 2011 at 04:55 PM // 16:55..
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Old Jul 18, 2011, 06:05 PM // 18:05   #3
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Originally Posted by awry View Post
I looked over at Gwen and Keiran eating each other’s faces.
lol, thought it said something else for a second there
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Old Jul 18, 2011, 06:55 PM // 18:55   #4
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You tagged along on their honey moon...?
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Old Jul 18, 2011, 11:14 PM // 23:14   #5
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not a very lore-friendly fan-fic...but hey, fan-fics these days rarely are.
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Old Jul 19, 2011, 12:28 AM // 00:28   #6
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Originally Posted by Ralisti View Post
lol, thought it said something else for a second there
Hehe, oh you

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Originally Posted by shinta_himura View Post
You tagged along on their honey moon...?
lol yeah, a bit awkward in retrospect. :P

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Originally Posted by RedDog91 View Post
not a very lore-friendly fan-fic...but hey, fan-fics these days rarely are.
Hrm, I'm guessing that's referring to the heroes? Yeah, the eles were running searing flames, jin was running a toucher build with bip main(I use her as a stance tank/elemental tank/battery). I should use lore more but I have some preconceptions of their personalities based on how I've used them :P
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Old Jul 19, 2011, 01:18 AM // 01:18   #7
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I should use lore more but I have some preconceptions of their personalities based on how I've used them :P
Thats just the thing...you gave most of the heros personalities completely different from what their lore-established personalities are. It would make more sense if you made up characters or used the names of friends/guildies/your other characters because then you could create and use any personality you want without leaving people confused as to why Gwen is suddenly a quirky girl instead of the cold woman that she is in reality.
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Old Jul 19, 2011, 03:15 AM // 03:15   #8
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i quite enjoyed it! i looked away from the seriousness of the lore of the game and imagined the heroes' personalities as you gave them! keep em coming
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Old Jul 19, 2011, 01:23 PM // 13:23   #9
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Good on you. I just finished a story but didn't really entertain the idea of putting it on Guru. Well, you've now made me do it. Thanks for the story.

http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/r...html?p=5530951
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Old Jul 19, 2011, 05:40 PM // 17:40   #10
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Chapter 4
“Get Behind the minions!” The wave of animals, rushed from the gates, eyes bloodshot and foam dripping out of their mouths. Their intent was clear, they wanted us. A flash of light came from gwen’s staff as she casted her incantation before I could finish my sentence. The afflicted animals fell into the trap and charged into the light. They shriked in unison as the light from gwen’s staff singed their eyes and they fell to the floor clawing wildly. My minions fell upon them and feasted, the sloppy sound of meat and bone tearing filled the air, but we did not dawdle to watch the scene. The afflicted were past the gate and the survivors were in visible terror as they advanced.


Razah summoned channeled his energy to summon spirits to hold off the pursuers who weren’t preoccupied with the minions and with our backs covered, Norgu quickly struck the afflicted with panic. Their numbers turned against them and the creatures began faltering. In tandem, Gwen and Norgu struck them with illusions and turned them against each other and I raised their fallen flesh once more to engage them in melee.

Once the fighting was done, I turned to the survivor. She looked at me with frightened eyes, and I talked in a soothing voice, “It’s all right now, the abominations are dead now.”

I heard the unmistakable sound of flesh slapping against the ground and turned my head around. One of my minions had decayed and the magics imbued in its flesh was now putrifying it at an alarming rate. Its flesh bubbled and disintegrated into black smoke. The other minions loafed around apathetically as their own flesh rippled with the occasional bubble or two.

I looked back at the terrified woman and smiled weakly. “Well… Ok, the abominations not on our side are all dead now.”



Chapter 5
“All right newbie, you know how to hold a wand right?” Initiate Tsuirai said, looking at me with disdain clearly visible on her face.

“Yes, but…”

“Then what are you doing with a spear and shield! You’re not a paragon!” She exhaled sharply. “Why did Zei Rei send me this fool,” she muttered.

“But I…”

“Enough! I suppose this is fine, maybe you can distract the afflicted long enough while I complete my mission of purifying the lake. Do not get yourself turned or I will strike you down myself! Now let’s going twinkle toes”

“I…”

Gwen stifled a laugh behind me. I shot her a dirty look, which seemed to make her laugh even harder. By Balthazar, marriage sure does change people. She reminded me more and more of the little Gwen I knew before the searing. Minus the cuteness of course, which seemed to somehow have turned into insufferable insolence.



We marched towards the lagoon. It was putrid and I could’ve found my way to it by smell alone. Tsuirai turned towards me and wagged her finger, “I'll handle the ritual to cleanse these waters. I need to be within the lagoon for it to work. Unfortunately, it's certain to draw out the Afflicted, so be prepared. If you let them interrupt me, so help you! Even if you survive them, you'll have to face me afterward.”

I rolled my eyes as she turned her back and I shouted to my party. Get ready, spirits up, Razah to the east of Tsuirai’s position. We head south for some hit and run. Tahlkora prepare to heal me when I give the signal, I’m going to infuse my own energy into my minions to give them a boost. Gwen, Norgu, stay at the back and cast on my signal when they have clumped together to strike my minions. Ogden, hit me with a protective spirit in 10 seconds, I’ll draw out their initial barrage of strongest attacks first. Ok go!

Beams of light, struck me as I ran forward, the afflicted made a beeline for me as I felt the tingling effect of the protective spirit Ogden cast on me. They struck me rapidly and I fought through the pain as I summoned, the rays of judgment ended and the minions behind me have finally shambled into position. I backpedaled, the afflicted tried to make pursuit but the oncoming wall of unfeeling flesh were there to stop them. I raised my arm, Norgu casted and Gwen followed suit. Their magicks and attacks were shut down and Sousuke began sending bolts of flame in their direction. They were locked into position, they struck at the minions trying to escape, but the enchantments I had placed on the minions took into effect and a putrid blast welcomed them. They fell quickly and we turned our eye back to Tsuirai. The spirits were about to fall, the minions ready to advance. We ran forward and intercepted, their numbers were large and on the other side, I could see more afflicted coming down a slope and making their way to the lagoon. I grit my teeth, this was not going to be good.

"Kaijun Don, hear my plea. These words I give, an offering to appease."
"Let cease the seething, a vengeance left there bleeding."
"To slide from shadow and release from sorrow, to hear the call of a brighter morrow."
"A day met as star again, rippled reflections looking clearly back to the heavens."

The lake rippled with energy and an incandescent light swallowed the afflicted advancing on our positions. Before I shut my eyes from the piercing rays, I could see the afflicted make something akin to a smile before disintegrating into the air.

I felt a slap on my back.

“Not bad… for a rookie”.




Chapter 6
“What next Zei Ri? Are we going to give Rhea’s Crater another cleansing?”

He looked at me puzzled amidst guffaws guffaws from sousuke and vekk, a sigh from gwen, a facepalm from tahlkora and Xandra turning beet red. “No, I am sure I told you that we have already cleansed all the afflicted in that area.”

Koss chimed in, “But it’s a really really giant crater, who knows what we’ll find in the bowels of that nether region.” He held out his hand wide to demonstrate and gestured at Xandra. “See Xandra’s a luxon, she knows how big those… tracts of land can get”

Melonni slapped him and everyone laughed except for Zei Rei who was still puzzled.

“I don’t know what you heroes are laughing at, but the situation is still dire. Although we’ve made great progress our scouts have detected the presence of Monstrous afflicted in the Morostav trail.” We’re throwing units at them to keep them isolated in the area, but we need to eradicate them once and for all.

I stopped laughing. “Yes, the monstrous afflicted will be dealt with. Xandra, you’re coming along this time. Time to bring out the big guns to deal with those big afflicted.”

Last edited by awry; Jul 19, 2011 at 06:42 PM // 18:42..
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